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They know that there is a power somewhere so. Sex World Records - Ask. Men. Page 1 of 2. I don’t know whether you’ve heard, but the Olympics is on. It’s not been mentioned that much, I don’t think. Just for context, it’s that show that’s been making you feel guilty about eating those nachos every evening. Whilst Michael Phelps is making us all feel really bad about skipping arm day to go to a beer garden, we thought we’d celebrate some guilt- free records that should be featured in the olympics if the committee would just loosen up. Gents, standing ovation for the athletes please – this is the weird world of sex world records. Longest Masturbation Session. Lord knows if we were granted unlimited free time we could all be masturbating until the cows come home, but Masanobu Sato has somehow managed to make that dream a reality. Sato, from Japan, holds the world record for the longest wank ever: in 2. Dutch TV show Metropolis paid Sato a visit to find out exactly what it takes to become a wank champion, and I’ll bet they wished they’d never pulled at that thread. Sato’s day begins with a two hour tug on his favourite beanbag chair as his cat watches, and it doesn’t really get much better from there. Amazingly, Sato lives with his girlfriend – I bet that fact is making everyone feel pretty bad about themselves right now – who helps him to maintain his title by timing his masturbatory sessions whilst she makes dresses on her sewing machine about three feet away. The 10 th biggest castle in the world dominates the skyline in the city of Edinburgh in Scotland. Interestingly, its structure is constructed in a volcanic crag that. We’re still not sure if Sato has an actual job or whether he literally hand- shandies the day away, but you know what they say – find a job you love and you’ll never work a day in your life. Sato. Most Frequent Sex. Everyone has one of those friends that, if you’ve done something, they’ve done it twice as much. If you’ve had sex twice in one night, they’ve done it five, and managed to kick your arse at Fifa somewhere in between. If that’s the case with one of your mates, maybe introduce him to this little guy. Your mate’s penis has got nothing on the Ornebius aperta. The Australian cricket may be hideous – seriously, disgustingly hideous – but it somehow has a way with the ladies. We don’t know what kind of energy drinks these horny little bastards are consuming but research shows that they can somehow copulate more than 5. I can only imagine the amount of chafing issues that are arising for both parties from all this extreme love making. Research conducted in the Royal Society Journal’s Biology Letters discovered that this “extreme repeated mating” was developing as a reaction to female- imposed limits – which, in this case, is the fact that the female cricket removes the sperm after ejaculation and immediately eats it. Of course she does, the filthy minx. The Longest and Smallest Penises. Because measuring penises is often hard to do accurately – yes, we know you exaggerate – there isn’t much reliable data on this topic for the 2. The most impressive medically verified penis sets the sex record at 1. Dr. Dickenson (seriously!). The smallest penis ever recorded sets the sex record at 0. There are a couple of conditions that can leave a man lacking so dramatically in his nether region. One such condition is having a micropenis, where most of the penis actually resides inside the body. The other is a condition called congenital hypoplasia, where the glans of the penis is attached directly to the pubis, so the shaft of the penis doesn’t exist. On the other, erm, hand, having a humungous penis may sound like the dream, but for those who actually possess one the opposite seems to be true. That’s exactly how Roberto Esquivel Cabrera feels about his penis, which reportedly measures an eye- watering 1. Roberto was in the news when he let celeb new site TMZ film him trying to weigh his penis on a set of kitchen scales, more commonly used for measuring out ingredients for cakes. He wanted to prove that his penis was real so he could 1) get disability allowance on account of his huge peen being an occupational hazard; and 2) get recognition from Guinness World Records. Whilst an official at the World Record Academy has already certified that he currently holds the world record for the longest penis, our boy Roberto is holding out for that Guinness World Record recognition. 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